“Godzilla vs. Kong” delivers gloriously dumb fun when the humans get out of the way

Godzilla vs. Kong (2021)

Each preceding entry in Warner Bros. and Legendary Pictures’ “MonsterVerse” seems to be a response to 2014’s “Godzilla.” Gareth Edwards’ film never felt like a franchise-starter, just an awe-inspiring restoration of the classic blockbuster that many complained was too much of a slow-burn and didn’t show enough lizard action. Of course, 2016’s “Kong: Skull Island” and 2019’s “Godzilla: King of the Monsters” went in the complete other direction — the former an efficient and thrilling popcorn movie, and the latter a bloated, if altogether fun, kaiju bonanza. This fourth entry is the culmination, a cross-over and literal clash of the biggest titans who share an ancient rivalry, and it's not Freddy and Jason, or the Xenomorphs and the Predator. When director Adam Wingard (2016’s “Blair Witch”) gets to show how unapologetically giddy he is about letting his titular god-like monsters smash things and throw punches, "Godzilla vs. Kong" is big dumb fun. Everything else just gets in the way of the main event, and veritable thrills and more reasons to care are sorely missed.

Since we last visited the “MonsterVerse,” King Kong is being held in a contained dome on Skull Island and monitored by cryptozoological organization Monarch, and Godzilla is considered humanity's savior to some. That all changes when Apex Cybernetics CEO Walter Simmons (Demián Bichir) recruits scientist and not-so-best-selling author Dr. Nathan Lind (Alexander Skarsgård), along with “Kong whisperer” Dr. Ilene Andrews (Rebecca Hall), who is nothing without her deaf-mute ward Jia (Kaylee Hottle), able to communicate with the big ape. Somehow, they hope Kong will lead them through the center of the earth—the Hollow Earth—and locate an energy source that’s powerful enough to defend against Godzilla. Meanwhile, Godzilla has been provoked and attacks the Apex headquarters, and it’s because Apex has developed a competing weapon. All at the same time in Pensacola, Florida, Madison Russell (Millie Bobby Brown), the teenage heroine whose parents were scientists employed by Monarch, and her comic-relief friend Josh (Julian Dennison) hook up with Bernie Hayes (Brian Tyree Henry), a former Apex Cybernetics technician turned conspiracy-theory podcaster; they seek to expose the company for its sinister machinations. Basically, Godzilla and Kong just want to fight, and everyone is just a sitting duck.

“This won’t end until one of them submits!” says Dr. Andrews when she and other disposable characters are caught in the crossfire. These fools may as well sit down, shut up, pass the popcorn, and place their bets. Like any Irwin Allen disaster movie, there is an overqualified cast here, which means there are no less than five new characters to introduce and a couple returnees to check in on (Kyle Chandler, as Madison’s father and Monarch’s deputy director, is barely there). Most of them are just along for the ride anyway, to take sides with Godzilla or Kong, and spout expository dialogue from Eric Pearson and Max Borenstein's busily plotted but mostly lazy script. Those buying a ticket to see two mutant alphas duke it out clearly aren’t here for the pesky humans, but when we aren’t watching these behemoths in action, the surplus of extraneous material detracts from the reason we are all here. Would it have hurt to give us something worth caring about in between the big smackdowns? 

It’s easy to get hung up on the boring human characters because it’s they who drive the plot and motivate Kong and Godzilla to do what they do. Then again, perhaps it’s silly to expect anything more when the film delightfully opens with Kong waking up in his sanctuary and scratching his booty. Alexander Skarsgård and Rebecca Hall mostly look adrift in underdeveloped roles, and Millie Bobby Brown's Madison gets far less to do besides go on an entire mission that feels like a "Stranger Things" bottle episode accomplishing very little. It is, however, sort of a kick to see Demián Bichir play a scotch-drinking slimeball suit of a bad guy, and he does seem to be having fun. Brian Tyree Henry also gets to be funny in a kooky, over-caffeinated kind of way as Bernie, while his grief over his late wife is only touched upon and therefore feels wedged-in. Above everyone, newcomer Kaylee Hottle emanates the most warmth and feeling as Jia, whose connection with Kong humanizes the ape.

Collateral damage be damned, the climactic skirmish set across beautifully neon-soaked cityscapes in Hong Kong is fun to watch and expertly constructed, as is Godzilla’s initial sea attack when Kong is being transported by a barge. The visual effects are more top-notch than ever, particularly for the very expressive Kong, whose fans will feel for him as if their own child is getting sucker-punched at recess by a bully. Kong fixing his dislocated shoulder is even a cute bit. Fortunately, Wingard embraces his large scope, favoring visual coherence and never muddying any of the monster choreography by setting everything solely at night or in the rain. Also, when Kong's cheerleaders follow him through Hollow Earth from an Antarctica outpost, their lightning-fast free-fall does recall a Universal Studios motion-simulation ride in the best way. As it promises, “Godzilla vs. Kong” does deliver some grand, crowd-pleasing entertainment when the giant lizard and the giant ape are pummeling each other. That might be something that audiences are starved to see, and while it can be a glorious spectacle to behold, not a single character genuinely matters. Even remembering most of their names becomes a challenge. There is an entertaining showreel of these titans in there somewhere amidst the empty padding, but those moments alone might not be enough to recommend all of “Godzilla vs. Kong.”

Grade: C +

Warner Bros. released “Godzilla vs. Kong” (113 min.) in theaters and on HBO Max on March 31, 2021.